BACK!
27 Jun 2009
Sorry for the long disappearance. I got really busy and was literally not home for all the weekends in June so far...to many weekend outings ....went to a picnic, party, casino, concert(Edgefest - it rocked!! I met my favorite band: Beast and the lady from that band Betty Bonifassi was SOO nice to me while she was signing my ticket - love her and her voice
) and another two parties in the past 3 weeks. Plus it was my birthday on the first week of June and today is my dad's birthday so it has been quite a month.
Hmm, so my diet has been going OK. That girl from work who called me fat...well we don't talk that much anymore and plus none of my co-workers like her, she tends to be alone all the time (like eat lunch alone etc.). Work has been going well too, we had a company BBQ yesterday and that was quite fun. There were a number of sporting activities but all I did was sit in the shade and chat with friends (it was hot but also breezy and nice).
I am also now an active badminton player. Ever since a picnic two weeks ago where I first played badminton after what maybe 4 years and rediscovered my passion for badminton (I was an avid badminton player when I was young), I feel the need to play badminton every week. Which is not really a problem because my friend who owns the badminton set works downtown as well so we meet up after work on Fridays and go to park and play badminton for a while...and boy is it fun! It is also a great way to stay active.
Anyways, I have to go help my mom cook for a dinner party she is throwing tonight. All of her friends are coming which is good because I really feel like staying in my room and relaxing this weekend.
) and another two parties in the past 3 weeks. Plus it was my birthday on the first week of June and today is my dad's birthday so it has been quite a month.Hmm, so my diet has been going OK. That girl from work who called me fat...well we don't talk that much anymore and plus none of my co-workers like her, she tends to be alone all the time (like eat lunch alone etc.). Work has been going well too, we had a company BBQ yesterday and that was quite fun. There were a number of sporting activities but all I did was sit in the shade and chat with friends (it was hot but also breezy and nice).
I am also now an active badminton player. Ever since a picnic two weeks ago where I first played badminton after what maybe 4 years and rediscovered my passion for badminton (I was an avid badminton player when I was young), I feel the need to play badminton every week. Which is not really a problem because my friend who owns the badminton set works downtown as well so we meet up after work on Fridays and go to park and play badminton for a while...and boy is it fun! It is also a great way to stay active.
Anyways, I have to go help my mom cook for a dinner party she is throwing tonight. All of her friends are coming which is good because I really feel like staying in my room and relaxing this weekend.
I am fat....
25 May 2009
I am fat. At least that is how I feel. TWO people told me that I was fat today. Not one, but TWO. So much for self esteem. The first one went something like " You are out of breath, get in shape." At the moment it was said, I didn't think much of it, but now if I reflect back, I realize that maybe that meant something. The second one went something like this: I was telling someone that I ate some ice cream over the weekend so that person replies back as " No wonder, I have been thinking how come you have been eating salads for lunch and getting fat." The fact that pissed me off is that I only ate a little bit of ice cream over the weekend. And for the rest of the week I have been in a strict diet of salads and lean meat. Can't I slack off a little bit over the weekend? I got annoyed that the person just automatically assumes that I consume mass amounts of junk food everyday. So now, I am feeling a little down 
I went to the gym and didn't even try my best. I was just so angry at myself for some reason. I already hated the way I looked and now I hate myself even more.
I went to the gym and didn't even try my best. I was just so angry at myself for some reason. I already hated the way I looked and now I hate myself even more.
Gym + Angels and Demons Tomorrow!
16 May 2009
So I joined Curves this Friday. I was quite indecisive on whether I should join or not. I was not sure if I could commit to it. But after joining it and doing a workout, I think I can. The people who work there are very friendly and the overall environment is very comfortable. Also, the one thing I like about it is the fact that you don’t spend a lot of time on a machine. Previously when I attended a regular community gym, the one problem I would have is that I would work extensively on one machine and it would end up straining a part of my body. Curves is also feasible time-wise and so far it seems like it is something I can stick to. Let’s see how that turns out.
In other news, I am off to watch Angels and Demons tomorrow. The reviews say it was OK but I am really psyched to watch it (since the last movie I saw on theaters was about 2 months ago plus I only half-read the book so I want to know what happens in the end). My friends who watched it already told that it was great. I am also going to go shopping tomorrow. I need a pair of nice black comfortable heels that I can wear to work. I am short (5’1
) and I feel even more short when I am surrounded by taller guys at work. The heels will help me to fit in more and allow me to reduce strain in my neck by not looking up as often as I would. Also I need some new makeup (my old ones are all over) and I think I am going to go to MAC for it this time. I usually go to Sephora but lately my friends have been telling me that MAC has great products as well. I also got a $5 giftcard from Starbucks (I won it by filling out a survey) and I am dying to spend it. I have NEVER had Starbucks coffee so I have to look around a little bit to see what I like. Overall, just psyched about tomorrow 
In other news, I am off to watch Angels and Demons tomorrow. The reviews say it was OK but I am really psyched to watch it (since the last movie I saw on theaters was about 2 months ago plus I only half-read the book so I want to know what happens in the end). My friends who watched it already told that it was great. I am also going to go shopping tomorrow. I need a pair of nice black comfortable heels that I can wear to work. I am short (5’1
) and I feel even more short when I am surrounded by taller guys at work. The heels will help me to fit in more and allow me to reduce strain in my neck by not looking up as often as I would. Also I need some new makeup (my old ones are all over) and I think I am going to go to MAC for it this time. I usually go to Sephora but lately my friends have been telling me that MAC has great products as well. I also got a $5 giftcard from Starbucks (I won it by filling out a survey) and I am dying to spend it. I have NEVER had Starbucks coffee so I have to look around a little bit to see what I like. Overall, just psyched about tomorrow
All's Well....
09 May 2009
So work did go well. I was a little scared on the first day but it eventually went away as I met my co-workers. They were very nice and relaxed (which was a good thing – gives me the idea that the job is not that stressful). Plus a friend of mine happens to work in the same department so I got to meet her. I haven’t actually started on my job yet – I am still training and this is expected to go on till next week. My coworkers are quite fun and we get along well which is again a good thing because I will be spending quite a lot of time with them over the next couple of months.
In other news, I am joining Curves next week. I checked it up on the internet and there was a lot of good vibe to it. It is expensive ($ 189 for 3 months – YIKES
) but hopefully it is worth it. I need to lose some weight overall and I am biking every Sunday for about an hour but that is just once a week. I really want to shed some pounds and I am hoping that Curves might help me achieve that (unlike the last times I joined the gym which was just so that I could hang with my friends – this time I am SERIOUS). I am also planning on going on a diet – well not a strict diet but just watching what I eat and incorporating lots of fruits and veggies into my diet (and cutting out my biggest weakness ice-cream and replacing it with yogurt). Hopefully this all works out.
Oh and a big shout out to my new affies Dolly and Liah
In other news, I am joining Curves next week. I checked it up on the internet and there was a lot of good vibe to it. It is expensive ($ 189 for 3 months – YIKES
) but hopefully it is worth it. I need to lose some weight overall and I am biking every Sunday for about an hour but that is just once a week. I really want to shed some pounds and I am hoping that Curves might help me achieve that (unlike the last times I joined the gym which was just so that I could hang with my friends – this time I am SERIOUS). I am also planning on going on a diet – well not a strict diet but just watching what I eat and incorporating lots of fruits and veggies into my diet (and cutting out my biggest weakness ice-cream and replacing it with yogurt). Hopefully this all works out.Oh and a big shout out to my new affies Dolly and Liah
Nervous About Tomorrow
03 May 2009
So I am starting work tomorrow and I am kinda nervous 
. Not just about the work itself but also I am worried about my health. I tend to get nausea/diarrhea like symptoms when I tend to wake up early in the morning, especially if I have been waking up at a later time in the previous days. It's sorta like morning sickness minus the pregnancy. I tried practicing getting up at 5am the past couple of days but the best I could do was 7am. I am also little nervous about the people I will be working with. I mean this is going to be my work life for the next 16 months so I am little excited to meet the "co-workers". Plus it is sort of a technical job and I am little nervous if I will be quizzed on my knowledge in the field (my friend who worked there before said they don't quiz people but that was 2 yrs ago). Anyways, I am going to bed soon to ensure I get a good night sleep so at least I am not tired as I dive into tomorrow.
. Not just about the work itself but also I am worried about my health. I tend to get nausea/diarrhea like symptoms when I tend to wake up early in the morning, especially if I have been waking up at a later time in the previous days. It's sorta like morning sickness minus the pregnancy. I tried practicing getting up at 5am the past couple of days but the best I could do was 7am. I am also little nervous about the people I will be working with. I mean this is going to be my work life for the next 16 months so I am little excited to meet the "co-workers". Plus it is sort of a technical job and I am little nervous if I will be quizzed on my knowledge in the field (my friend who worked there before said they don't quiz people but that was 2 yrs ago). Anyways, I am going to bed soon to ensure I get a good night sleep so at least I am not tired as I dive into tomorrow.
I Hate Shopping?
30 Apr 2009
I have to go shopping for work clothes tomorrow. And I really hate it - the shopping part. It wasn't always like that. I remember those times when my heart would flutter as I would see merchandise stacked up by the saleswomen in the store. Well that feeling is all gone now. And the reason - I have become an extremely picky shopper. Like REALLY picky, as in my friends get a shot of java before they endure a shopping trip with me. And why am I this picky? Well I blame it on my long encounter with the mirror I had once that led me to pick my body apart with my eyes and deem several parts of it unsuitable for public display. How picky did I get? Well picky enough not to find a shirt that I could wear to work (this is going to be my third shopping to fulfill this purpose)
All I ask from a top is to do the following: a)cover the top part of my thighs b)cover my ass c)flow away my body (rather than stick to it although I don't mind cinching at the waist) and d) have sleeves. Is this too much to ask for? Well according to my friends YES. They think I am this picky because I have self-image problems. And yes, a part of me might want to go back to the skinny me that I was 8 years ago but the rest of me is happy with the way I am now. I think my picky-ness in clothes come down to one thing: comfort. I am just not comfortable when short top reveals my ass and my muffin belly to the world. It makes me uncomfortable and eventually I start concentrating on what people might be thinking about the way I am presenting myself rather than focus on the task at hand.
Regardless, it is vital for one to buy new clothes once a while to survive in society and I am going to embark on this fascinating journey tomorrow.
All I ask from a top is to do the following: a)cover the top part of my thighs b)cover my ass c)flow away my body (rather than stick to it although I don't mind cinching at the waist) and d) have sleeves. Is this too much to ask for? Well according to my friends YES. They think I am this picky because I have self-image problems. And yes, a part of me might want to go back to the skinny me that I was 8 years ago but the rest of me is happy with the way I am now. I think my picky-ness in clothes come down to one thing: comfort. I am just not comfortable when short top reveals my ass and my muffin belly to the world. It makes me uncomfortable and eventually I start concentrating on what people might be thinking about the way I am presenting myself rather than focus on the task at hand.
Regardless, it is vital for one to buy new clothes once a while to survive in society and I am going to embark on this fascinating journey tomorrow.
Harlequin Addiction
29 Apr 2009
I have become addicted to Harlequin movies. Having my romantic dreams fulfilled by fictional characters is apparently the way to go. It's truly sad in a very miserable kind of way. I am too ashamed to admit this to my friends, I think they might laugh at me. My dad, who went on his first (of many soon to come) round to pick up the many Harlequin movies I have put on hold in the library, gave me the "why-are-you-watching-movies-with-people-making-out-on-the-cover" look when he handed the movies over to me today. I am beginning to realize that my watching mushy Harlequin movies is just another way for me to avoid the dating scene in real life. Well I am not willing to change yet, so I guess for now I have a date with a long list of Harlequin movies.
in a very miserable kind of way. I am too ashamed to admit this to my friends, I think they might laugh at me. My dad, who went on his first (of many soon to come) round to pick up the many Harlequin movies I have put on hold in the library, gave me the "why-are-you-watching-movies-with-people-making-out-on-the-cover" look when he handed the movies over to me today. I am beginning to realize that my watching mushy Harlequin movies is just another way for me to avoid the dating scene in real life. Well I am not willing to change yet, so I guess for now I have a date with a long list of Harlequin movies.
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